Life's Choices

For him far too many variables

Eyes to the left, eyes to the right

Incoming from both sides

Hands sweaty, both jitters and fright

Why'd choose this path, he asks no one

Oh for a Google map with no guarantee anyways

To plod on once commitment's forgone

A destination imagined, dreamt of, forever and always

Thing is, you ain't driving all lonely

Whistling a tune when the conversations go lonely

Diversions, distractions, stoppages all plenty

Threatening to stray, to paltry, to forgo sanity

A full U-turn beckons up ahead

A change, a route unchartered on offer

A funny bone tickled, a guffaw emitted

A choice neither asked nor preferred

Baggage, passengers accidental & planned aplenty

All  that start-overs require a severe discard

To not end making the move an insanity

Made at speeds of pure disregard

So he ignores the pass

And presses ahead unerring

Whatever comes, what life hands he'll accepts

With a smile, a song, strong hope unending

Whatever, wherever goes, he quietly reciprocate

There's wonderment to discover, to receive, to appreciate.

Painting of U-Turn by Jessalin Beutler | Saatchi Art 

Self Inflicted Fallacies

Finally, its come to the fore.

There was really no one to blame but us.

Not the politicians we elevated to the status of demi gods.

Not our yesteryears fuedal lords, whose existence these days are ceremonial at best.

Nor was it the colonial British we pretended to be glad to be rid off, and yet we continue till today to look upon with awe and reverence.

It was just us all the while.

Us and our own complexities.

We've been propping all these crutches on ourselves.

Why?

And why do we still fearful of independence to this day?

The Calming of Nerves aka About Time

And Irving Wallace’s “The writing of one novel” makes it two. The first, and still favourite, being Stephen King’s excellent On Writing.

A pipe smoking author: who wouldn't want to read this?

Both are memoirs and how to books with King edging Wallace in sheer entertainment for me.
Wallace’s “The writing of one novel” is a darn great read for me as it provides the perfect basis for a style of writing which I am familiar; with researched materials being the starting block.

“The writing of one novel” is about the pipe smoking American author’s journey – literal as well as figurative – in writing a fictionalised Nobel Prize winner.

Starting from the sparking of an idea – if I am not mistaken, it was initially for a magazine article – to the digging of details through extensive research including interviews (imagine that!), his outlining of the storyline and characters, the first draft review process, publishing and the controversies that follow.

Is “The Prize” - the novel’s title - a worthy read? I do not know as I have not read it. It occupies a genre which I must admit to being less than enthusiastic to pick up the book and start flipping.

Both Wallace and King are strong proponents of the adage that writers must be voracious readers.

I’ve been stocking my reading materials (heh) and never getting round to doing the tough bit of, urm, reading them.

I keep telling myself that to finally write that novel I’ve always dream of, I need to read, and read a lot. And start writing even as the reading goes on.

By God, I will start the last mentioned act as I have been putting this off for a long, long time. Ideas ready; initial research's done, draft materials in place; so what’s stopping me?

Nerves.

And, oh, I need to find myself a muse. Seems to work best with one around.

Days We Stood Still

I posted this on 29th July 2011 and sadly, five years later, nothing's changed for the people of Syria.

Blessed Surrender

The silence unnerves her

A once bustling boulevard

Thrash strewn amidst jostling crowd

Of whom there were none this day

Slowly she walks

Afraid of hearing her own shuffling

Past what was once, what, a tent?

A smoldering heap, charred tinder

At the centre of the stillness

A hulk of a steely monster stood, once arrogant

A mangled cage, trace echoes of scream

Of its occupants dying a lifetime of death

Pass the iron horror she trudges ahead

Directionless, willed only by the need to move

Somewhere, anywhere

Where there is a soul

Kindred or otherwise

A soul she ask a soul she seeks

Except for the hulking wreckage where she gagged a vomit

The air is pure is clean is sure

A sun soaked clarity of a surround

Alas there was only sight but not a single sound

Except for a rustling of wind ruffled debris

Other than a gust of strewn dust

A square, of tents in people pushed to the brink

Finding their voices found long subdued

Only to be mutedly strangled

Tyrannical hands of vile might

Soon is Ramadhan*

Is it not she thinks?

A month for shackling of lust of pride of desires

A month of peace of penance of repentance

A month of endless joys in blessed surrender

Ten nights of fruitful embracing of faith

If only

There was someone

Anyone to welcome

A month so waited

She trudges

Wondering why there was no scent

When death was too many

Too plenty too heart rending

Perhaps its Syuhada then

She thinks

She walks

She ponders

Dedicated to the lives lost in for making their voices heard.

* Ramadhan will also be upon us soon. I dare not be flippant of such grotesque irony.

Late Evening of A Few Sitting - Whatever that Means..

It's been a long while now that I've been able to finish a book in one sitting.

With Mark Haddon's "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time",  I've managed to do so in three.

Admittedly the book is not that beefy in pages, though it is in content.

The dry, Brit humor present early on somewhat petered off towards the end - which was positive and, well, happy enough - but it had enough to keep me hooked to the end.

Even got to the part about the advertisement on Malaysia at the Tube Stations / Network. 

Since the book was written in 2003, it was still Malaysia Truly Asia.

I've mentioned that the book is beefy in content: it is.

I'm especially drawn to the portions about how the mind works to interpret characters, situations, events and everything else.

The skewed, autistic mindset and logic-based reasoning from main character Christopher makes things so easy when we know full well that isn't the case.

Would I go for a second, third and subsequent read of this as I do some firm favorites? I don't know. Give it time to rest a bit.

As the night was still relatively young when I finished Curious Incident, I started also on Superman Unchained.

(Of course there would a comic thrown in...)

What drew me to this trade paperback was Jim Lee's art and yup, while it all looked so damn familiar, I can't say that I didn't enjoy flipping through the pages.

I'm never a fan of Superman as I think his motivations are suspect, but the storyline itself was quite entertaining since Bats and Wonder Women were in it as well.

Like we Malaysian always say: "Boleh la.."

Contrasting colours.

Until the next few-sitting reads come along, let's continue to enthralled by the shenanigans of 1eMDeeB.

Ciao.
 

Life's a Splurge

Hokay.

This month - and contrary to my usual interests - I've splurged on books.

I've bought Fergie's Leading, The Story of Alibaba and Mitch Albom "Frankie Presto".

The problem now is finding the time to read them.

I've done a few pages of Leading and I'm thinking I could zoom through perhaps in one sitting this weekend.

Leading is written is a laid back manner and the tie-up to football and Man United makes it easier to read, as compared to "6 ways to Kill Innovation" which I bought last month which on hindsight was a waste of good money.

Should have just bought a trade paper back of something from the comic lineups.

Anyway, I've ranted about the prices of book going crazy, so I am thankful for MPH's celebratory discounts in blunting the impact.

All three books came with 20 - 30% discount, by the way.

Okay, I must admit that I did sneak in DD's Reborn by Andy Diggle and you know what, I love the short transit from the all heavy duty writing of Brubaker, Bendis and (even) Waid.

Perhaps its the one off storyline. Or the simple and largely overused plot.

I'm thinking the stress of routine work / life cycle is getting to me that such diversions are most welcomed.

Hokay again. Going back to work soon and leaving you with this:

 

Adios. 

 

Combo

How do you decide the books to buy?

The cover? The title? The review? The author? A combination, perhaps?

For most, I think it would be a mixed combo: perhaps author and review.

I was browsing Borders for Henry Mintzberg's Strategy Safari today, failing any headway that I made haste to the fiction racks instead.

Who am I kidding: I haven't even read David Owen's Creative People Must Be Stopped which I bought a few weeks back.

Anyway, I made way to authors with the W surname and there it was: Sarah Winman's A Year of Marvelous Ways.

Having read Star's review on the book, my curiousity was piqued and (TQVM Borders for NOT plastic wrapping the novels) I flipped through the pages.

The writing was in fact enchanting.

They were poetic and yet flowing; and even though it wasn't something which would hook me to read cover to end in one sitting, I toyed with the idea of buying it.

The I saw the price: at RM69.90, A Year of Marvelous Ways was easily double the typical Stephen King's crap horror vintages which I would not hesitate to fork money out notwithstanding the literary critics review.

Was it the dreaded exchange rate at work? Will the comics be similarly jaw drooping expensive in the very near future?

Is reading going to be a snobbish, elite activity?

I dread.

Celebrating Coolness this Malaysia Day

Once upon a time, I took up Karate.

And no, I didn’t do so because I watched too many Bruce Lee’s movie.

Although the Korean Fighter in the Wind might have worked wonders; it’s highly stylized moves and all.

Nope; as is usually the case, I joined the College’s Karate Club since a female student I was attracted had signed up earlier.

I managed to get to the first rung (Green belt) and then decided that Karate was not for me.

And the female student had also given up anyway.

I managed to nonetheless participate – if you call losing in the first round as such – in an inter-Karate-club tournament and it was fun while it lasted.

And then, one of my friends convinced me to take up Silat instead.

I have always been cynical and have this vision that Silat equals Mantras equals I don’t wanna be there.

(Blame this on P Ramlee's "Pendekar Bujang Lapok." Heh.)

He said there was nothing of that kind of shit and the one he’s joining is all physical, typical martial arts type.

Against my better judgement, I joined.

Lo and behold, the “class” was held at night and in open field.

Coolness personified

While there was no Mantras – at least in the stage I went in – we did have lime juice eye drops to "clear our vision".

The way the class was conducted was also different in that while my Karate sessions are filled with exercises to strengthen your physicality, the Silat had a lot of repeat techniques with a Partner in tow.

Did I go far?

Nahh…. As before I quit half way and so did my friend.

Why? We found it so bleeping hard to score with the female exponents with mosquitos buzzing around even as we practice the moves.

These days?

I’m contended with reading about Matt "Daredevil" Murdock karate chopping the baddies and the occasional kungfu movies.

Selamat Hari Malaysia everyone. 

Let’s not Kuntau each other, shall we?

Remember, martial arts are for self defence and also, looking cool.

Hands Dirtying Act

And here we thought that Najib is on swell terms with Goldman Sachs.

Maybe there is a pouting moment here, what’s with the whole controversy swirling around 1MDB and Goldman Sachs' role.

Anyway, I digress.

This is in relation to the supposed reactivation of govt equity investment firm , Valuecap, “to shore up the country's stock market”.

The amount – while certainly more than, urm, RM2.6 b – is pretty small when compared to the money pumped by the Chinese government to “prop up (its) plunging stock market.”

Of, course China’s equity market have tumbled like an unstable pack of cards line atop each other to start with.

Didn’t do much help and the bigger fear would then what if the government then decides to stop hoarding and pull out.

Our stock market have seen better days, but as is forever the economic cycle, there will be bulls and there will be bears.

So why the RM20b injection?

And where is this fund coming from?

Why the selected stocks and who decides?

At what point which Valuecap stop, urm, propping and starts selling again to recoup?

Or is there going to be no recoup?

Can Najib simply, simply take RM20b from the national coffers to pump into the share market which is supposed to be market driven without the Parliament's okay?

RM20b is not exactly peanuts and last generations.

Why is the govt getting its hand dirty again with such a commercialized move? Doesn’t 1MDB provide any experience on the folly of doing so?

Or are we missing a bigger picture here?

Not us, of course.

The Disgustingly New, Normal

Are we seeing the so called new normal with regards the Ringgit vis-à-vis the major currencies?

I hope not especially since we are so looking forward to an overseas trip early next year.

Still some time to pray that the current levels are not “the new normal”, Amin.

Anyway, to continue on my light ranting: the weakened Ringgit will push the comic book price up summore.

Out soon. Can't wait.

Sheesh.

How I wish I am working and earning in Singaporean Dollar where this is concern.

Imagine getting Brian K. Vaughan’s acclaimed “Saga” - the compilation la – for less than 25 units of the currency.

(I’m using this NOT in relation to 1MDB’s “Units, just units” ya. Please.)

Here, you’re paying something like 80 or thereabout units per volume.

Imagine if both you and your Singaporean comic geek counterpart is earning the same amount of units in monthly salary of say 3,500 units – a realistic figure for a slightly experience junior staff.

That would mean if you happen to the whole set currently available – Volumes 1 to 4 (5 is out soon, Yay!) – you’re gonna be spending 9.15% of your monthly salary while the dude across the Causeway spends 2.86% of his.

Crossing over use to make some sense those days of the old  normal (is there such a word?) as even converted, comic books prices are still on the lowish side compared to buying over here.

Unless Borders / Kinokuniya go the Big Bad Wolf Super Duper Sale’s route, that is.

Now, the cost differentials from conversion is almost equal or worse.

Every now and then, I continue re-reading my old, loose issues, comic and you can still see the price tags – I’ve gotten copies at RM1.80 and RM2.50 mint - pasted on the covers.

Ooh, I so hate this new normal thingy.